How to Evaluate your Employees
| ORGANIZER | FAR EXCEEDS JOB REQUIREMENTS | EXCEEDS JOB REQUIREMENTS | MEETS JOB REQUIREMENTS | NEEDS IMPROVEMENT | DOES NOT MEET MINIMUM REQUIREMENTS |
| QUALITY OF WORK | Leaps tall buildings with a single bound | Leaps tall buildings with a running start | Can leap short buildings if prodded | Bumps into buildings | Cannot recognize buildings |
| PROMPTNESS | Is faster than a speeding bullet | Is as fast as a speeding bullet | Would you believe a slow bullet | Misfires frequently | Wounds self while handling gun |
| INITIATIVE | Is stronger than a locomotive | Is as strong as a bull elephant | Almost as strong as a bull | Shoots the bull | Smells like a bull |
| ADAPTABILITY | Walks on water | Keeps head above water | Washes with water | Drinks water | Wets pants |
| CONVERSATION | Talks to God | Talks with angels | Talks to himself | Argues with himself | Looses argument with himself |
